chippedsoul | The Journal [Inbox]

[ She sees no reason to stop him. There is a nervous quality to the smile she gives him. She chooses that moment to toss some of her hair back behind her shoulders, as if she doesn't know what do with it.

Relax, he says. ]

Um... Okay.

[ She'll try. For a while she was content to just sit there at the edge, lulled by the familiar warmth of the water. Well after Kazuma has gone into the shower room, however, that towel comes all the way off and she finally does more than just splash her feet. It's insane how vulnerable this makes her feel. She easily sinks into the comfort of the water.

Soaking. Fidgeting. She might have blown some bubbles? (What is she, five years old?) ]

[All this happening and Kazuma isn't there to see it. It's fine, he thinks Susato probably needs a little space before he joins her anyway. He might be taking a little longer in the shower, having a bit more dirt and grim to clean off. Not a big deal, and he's soon wiping himself down with a towel except....there's blood?

He blinks, seeing blood smeared over his towel. He checks himself, there are no open wounds to be seen? He looks down at his feet, eyes widening. There was blood everywhere, and a moment later, he lifts his hand to find blood himself.] What...?! [He can't wipe it off. There's just so much. There may be some thumping at the shower door as he moves about to clean this impossible mess.]

[ Susato's eyes are closed, and she's trying to think of what the hell else they're supposed to do in a bath. Bubbles are fun, but it's tempting to doze off again. Can she just sleep through the embarrassment? (So much for a young maiden's secrets.) Luckily...or not, her eyes shoot wide open when she hears the sudden exclamation. It takes her a moment to react. She has to be sure she didn't dream that. ]

...Kazuma-sama?

[ She glances over towards the shower room, where the water is still running. She doesn't see anything unusual, and is perhaps prepared to leave it alone, but then she can hear the thumping. She cleans enough to be able to recognize something familiar about it.

The hell is he doing? After a while, she looks left and then right, as if a dream carriage might show up in the bathroom at any moment to run her over. Then Kazuma will hear the sound of approaching footsteps (or will he?)--gentle and tentative. ]

[Shit. No matter how much he tries to clean it up, there's still blood everywhere. It's going to flow out, she'll see. The water is still run, hoping it'll wash the blood down the drain. Susato will receive no reply, only this uneasy chill the closer she gets to the shower room.]

[ Something might have flowed out, but it's just water if anything. Susato checked. She's still not sure whether she should intrude on what should be his private time, but she presses her ear against the shower room door, thinking he probably just didn't hear her.

She can feel the thumping and scrubbing getting worse. She pulls back and finally knocks. ] Kazuma, what's wrong?

[Fang has made a screech from somewhere outside the bathroom, agitated by something. Don't come in here. Shit, shit, shit-]

Don't come in here! [Oh yea, that'll stop Susato. In fact, it'll probably make her worry even more. Trying to cover things up would also be pointless around her.] Just--there's just blood everywhere!

[ How is there so much happening all of a sudden? Fang's screech is somewhat distant by comparison, but still concerning. It feels like the sound goes straight into her ears and right down her spine. She turns her head, wondering what the chances are that an intruder has found his way in, but ultimately, Kazuma wins out.

Her heart feels like it stops. She pounds on the door some more, as if the barrier is suddenly a nuisance. ]

What do you mean? Are you hurt?

I don't- [The questioning, the continuous flow of blood, it's all starting to disorientate him. Fang is clawing at the bathroom door to be let in, as if recognizing something is wrong with her caretaker. There's a thud as Kazuma ends up sitting against the shower wall. Breathe. Just sit there and breath. He shuts his eyes, trying to focus on just breathing.]

[ . . .

Sorry, Fang. It's hard to listen to. Susato glances towards the bathroom door, but ultimately she continues paying more attention to the one in front of her. She is breathing faster suddenly, her sense of urgency flaring up like her inner flame. She is borderline frantic by the time she hears him thud against the wall, and finally she realizes there is no lock it all. There never was.

She's not sure what to expect when she opens that door, but she does so with a heavy slam. Her hand is shaking. ]

[ There's nothing. No blood. Just the shower running, a soaking wet towel, and Kazuma, slumped on the ground. She can see him shaking too, breathing with effort, but they can't both be stuck in this.

After taking a moment to take in the scene, Susato drops to her knees and throws her arms around him in a hug. ]

[He freezes at the sudden contact. It feels even colder in the shower. Damn. He had no idea what to say. Thought things would get better with his mind distracted. Thought he could at least keep it together around Susato.

Relax.

His arms are noodles while he tries to put them around Susato. Fang is still crying from outside. Come on, he just needs to relax.]

[ Susato shivers beneath his touch, as if only just now noticing the temperature drop. Is she seeing her breath, or is she just imagining it? Either way, they stay like this. She is determined to allow him all the time he needs.

She isn't usually one with the warm, radiant heat around her, but just for today, when he needs it the most... maybe she is.

She still needs to say something. ] Relax. I'm here.

[She's here. His grip may have tighten as he clings to her flesh. Skin? They were going to enjoy a bath, weren't they? His breathing steadies, his eyes, slowing opening. He was expecting to still see a sea of red, but there was just water. Susato before him, giving him a warm embrace. The rest of his senses eventually come back to reality, and he rest his head on her shoulder.

The temperature gradually returns to normal. Fang is still calling from outside, though not as intense as before. What a mess.]

[ She may have repeated the words a few times, waiting desperately for some sign that he was OK. I'm here. Relax. You're OK. He's OK. She glances up at the ceiling, focusing for a moment on Fang's cries, as if wanting to channel the feelings to her as well, so that she knows. It's not until the temperature starts to rise again, and she feels his head on her shoulder, that she starts to relax herself.

Tension starts to flow out of her body with the water. Susato still refuses to move. The constant stream of water starts to feel heavy against her skin, weighing her down until she plops next to him with some effort, hand slipping from his shoulder to his upper arm.

Feels like she's been holding her breath for some minutes. Maybe she has.

Was this her fault? ]

[Her presence and constant reassurance that everything's fine is honestly appreciated, even if he isn't telling her. Mostly trying to work out what to do from here. His head moves to lean against the shower wall, a hand moving to rest against the back of Susato's head.]

Sorry. [He manages to get a word out. Quietly.] I'm all right. [There is no blood anywhere to be seen.]

[ Susato leans into his touch, and squeezes his arm as her way of acknowledging his apology. Words still choke her when she tries to speak them, caught in her throat. It is difficult to speak, but whatever the case, she doesn't seem to be in a hurry to leave. ]

I'm relieved. But... someday... [ She swallows. ] Someday, I fear you will have no choice but to talk about it. [ Somehow. One way or another. She still remembers one of the first conversations they ever had here, when she asked him about the nightmares. ] I want--

[ No. Not just 'want.' ]

I will be there, when that happens. [ Whether he likes it or not. ]

Edited 2022-06-18 23:22 (UTC)

...Yes. [She's not wrong, as much as he wants to tell her otherwise.] I know you will be. [Honestly, sooner or later, he'd talk about it, if it's Susato. Just...not yet. Not on the floor of the shower room for sure. His hands lower to grip hers.]

Let's...just get up from the floor. [Turn off the water so they aren't drenched. There are still sounds of chirping from Fang.] Let Fang see that I'm all right. [Naked, but all right.]

[ What do you mean, naked--

Some of Susato's composure starts to slip as she is turning red all over again. She's still recovering from all that, and at the same time, the mention of Fang saddles her with a slight guilt. She squeezes his hand in return, then moves to stand with somewhat stilted motions as the water threatens to send her back onto the floor.

It doesn't. (This time.) A small mercy. ]

O, Of course. I would have let her in sooner, but I just-- well, you--

No, I'm glad you came for me when you did. [Really, he just-

Ah. Her face is going red. And she is exposed to him. He is looking. What were they doing?]

...We simply should not keep her waiting, that's all. [He carefully scoots passed her, still holding onto her with one hand as he makes his way out. The floor is a bit slippery outside the shower room due to the water having leaked out. He can't spot any clean towels he can use in the vicinity to cover himself so- ]

[ He is looking. She is looking. What else did she expect?

At the very least, she'll try to keep her gaze high, because it's not like she hasn't seen his bare chest before. Then he pulls ahead of her, and she stares up at the back of his head as she clings to his hand.

Just... don't look too far down? Don't--

If he really wants a towel, she can have hers that she hung near the wooden tub. ]

I'll come with you. I should... [ I should apologize. But she trails off there, looking off to the side as if the empty bathtub is suddenly very interesting. It's probably cold by now, huh...? ]

[He glances behind to her.] ...I'm sure Fang would like to know you're okay as well.

[That's probably what she's thinking? Eitherway, he isn't waiting for her to finish as he opens the door for Fang to see them both. She coos relieved to see they were all right. Wet and without their clothes, but fine. As he gives her assuring headpats, he recalls Susato's attention was on the tub at one point.]

I'll warm the water back up, if...you were still interested, of course. [Cause there was a whole lot of awkward just now.]

Huh? [ Straightening her back, she turns her attention back to him. Even she isn't entirely sure what she'd been about to say, though after a moment, she is aware enough to figure it out.

Once Kazuma is done, it's her turn, and she doesn't hold back with the pets. ]

Of course she would. [ And then, despite how silly it feels, she goes for it. ] I am sorry we kept you waiting... my learned friend.

[ She glances back at the tub at its mention. She's probably still red in the face, but it occurs to her then that Kazuma isn't the only one between them that should be able to warm up the water. ]

We... um, we could both use the time to soak, if Fang would wait for us a little longer. [ Maybe she can fetch them more towels-- ]

[Fang purrs once she saw them both are alright and given pats. While she would like to stay, she understand well enough the humans have clearly not completed their cleaning routine(?).]

She'll be fine. Ah, actually. [He calls to her before she wanders off.] Can you get us some more towels? [She perks up at being given a task and off she goes.]

All right. [He's turning back to her. Where is he looking without offending her-] We can do that. [Should he just...put an arm around her? Maybe she won't feel so embarrassed?]

[ The way Fang perks up at her given task is adorable, and she will totally focus on that than wherever Kazuma may be looking. She doesn't linger after Fang leaves though, making a beeline for the tub, so if he places an arm around her, they will approach the tub together.

Don't think, Susato, just get in the damn water.

Susato dips a foot in-- ]

[ --and recoils slightly. Nothing compared to the chill she had felt in the shower room, but compared to what she had expected from before, it's enough to make her hesitate. ]

It got cold without you. [ She presses on regardless with nothing more than a slight wince, until she gradually sinks herself the surface. Her mouth dips just below the water line and she breathes out, making bubbles appear (again). ]

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CW: Blood imagery

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